Take That, I'm home again

Yes, I'm back in sunny England, I have to say, we all laugh about our weather but it was just as bad in Germany, just a little colder. As usual when I go away, I had forgotten a few essentials, a jumper, my phone charger and a razor being the main things this time. The razor was sorted easily enough, I used Anjas lady shave which as far as I was concerned was no different to any other razor. The only difference I can now see is that lady shavers are designed to cut blokes to pieces. I have not cut myself since I went through puberty and started trying to get rid of the fluffy haze that I referred to as a beard!

The phone charger was more tricky, I had to keep the phone turned off and just check messages once a day. It actually lasted until last night when I landed in London. I stayed overnight at my best mates, had 1 too many pints of Guiness and left it there this morning, DOH! Its being posted back to me tomorrow!

The Jumper was the thing that Anja decided to bring up at every given moment, whenever I thought I had a bit of one upmanship on a subject, I would be brought down to earth as I shivered in the cold wind as was asked why I was not wearing something warm, women!

I will tell you more about the trip over subsequent days, in the meantime, I have to tell you about the trip back. I was sat in the British Airways Plane praying that the overweight smelly man that had checked in behind me was not going to end up next to me when someone in front caught my eye. 'My', I thought, that man looks strangely like Mark Owen. Wow, thats a coinsidence the bloke next to him looks like Gary Balow. Well, no coinsidece, Take That were sitting 2 seats in front of me!

I decided not to say anything to them on the flight, I had a book to read, 48 pages left, I had to finish it before touch down.

On our departure from the plane I walked alongside them, pretended that I was with them, everyone turning thinking, 'I wonder who the new member of the band is?' It was at that point something terrible happened, I heard myself whistling a tune, not just any tune, I was whistling 'Want You Back' while walking alongside the band that had originally sung it. The shame, what must they have thought? It was at that point I thought of changing my hum to a Robbie Williams song, to see if I got a reaction but I resisted.

I had a bit of banter with them in the queue at the passport lounge but apart from that kept myself to myself, I work in the industry, I certainly wasn't going to come over all star struck!

I then left them, desperate for the toilet and found the urinals. Now those of you that are males reading this will know that the urinal in the middle is the least preferred, it is also the place where stage fright is most likely to happen. Not that I normally have a problem with that so up I went. All of a sudden, as if by magic, Mark Owen appears by the side of me, well that was it, I couldn't go. There is nothing worse than standing at the urinal, nothing happening and then having to pretend to finish and walk off STILL needing the loo. What was even worse is that I didn't want to admit I couldn't go so I just stood there and waited for Mark to finish as it was obvious what had happened if not. Well that man must have drunk the plane dry, I have never known anyone to pee for so long!

So there we go, a trip to Germany and a pee with Take That, you can never say my life is dull!